Love, Pain and God

Does anyone really understand love? Why does she love me, why does she not, why does she not do anything about it or why does she smother me with it. Why do you love one person and not another? What is it about them that makes your brain say yes? Why is it that some of the best people can remain alone and unloved when other much less lovely people are loved excessively? And the biggest question of them all (for me at least) How do you take that step, how do you take the risk and open yourself up, how do you tear down the barriers that you have so carefully maintained for so many years and let someone in to your world. Even knowing the pain of loneliness how do you bring yourself to the point where you can believe it’s worth the risk?

I don’t suppose anyone really has the answers, everyone just sort of muddles their way through it don’t they but I just find myself asking. I find myself wondering whether it’s finally time to take that risk? Whether we should give it a go? I like her and she likes me and we both know it, we have for ages. But there’s so much pain in our pasts, so much that makes us scared to move forward, scared to let each other in, scared that we’ll get hurt like we did before.

Why does life have to hurt?

I know that we grow in facing challenges, that we make progress when we have a reason to, I know a comfy man is never like to rip his world apart and rebuild it better, I know that sin is in the world and in people and that creates problems, that makes stuff harder and more painful and above all I know that God hates to see us hurting because he loves us.

And after all that, which makes perfect sense and I absolutely believe, I still find myself wondering, why does life have to hurt?

These are issues that people have been dealing with for as long as there have been people. I don’t really expect to understand completely until I stand in eternity with God, but as they say a problem shared is a problem halved. It seems to me the more we make it OK to talk about all the scary things in life the better we’ll be because we’ll see that together cool successful people have the same problems, the same concerns, we’re all only human. We all need to be loved, to be listened to, to be reassured, to know that people care, to know that we are not alone.

As much pain and confusion as love may cause and as scary and risky as taking that step can be and as many failed relationships and divorces as there are, love is still the greatest thing on Earth, I absolutely still believe that.

Three things will last forever-faith,  hope, and love-and the greatest of these is love.   1 Corinthians 13:13


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